Currently Watching Chariots of Fire By Ian Charleson, Ben Cross see related

Wow...it's been a WHILE. Life has been kinda hectic, to say the least. I FINALLY GRADUATED!!! wow. so cool.  But the biggest thing right now is ironically taking this total leap of faith to go to South Africa. I leave in 3 days, and I find myself oscillating between excitement and anxiety/homesickness (and I haven't even left yet!!). This is a really big deal for me. I have never trusted God enough to do something like this, where there is no possible way for me to be in control. One thing I've learned over the last 2 yrs or so, is that when I am truly myself, I am SOOOO Type-A personality. I like to be in control and the leader, organizing things for everyone else, rather than being a follower. I am becoming more and more the perfectionist(tho my organization skills are still trailing behind). So to go to Africa is placing six whole weeks of my life completely out of my hands, out of my control and that is really really scary. But I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this is where God wants me, so I am there.(or will be rather). I know now, more than ever, in my life, that God is the reason I live each day. He is the reason I breathe, and I can sing, and I can see, and I can cry, and I can laugh. I've never had enough faith to say that. Rather than my faith being in my head, its now in my heart. 

Today my dad sat me down, and we watched certain scenes from Chariots of Fire, possibly the best film ever made. If you are a Christian and have not seen the film, when I get back, I will have a "watching" party- possibly even at my parents house. Stay tuned. But to get back on track, this movie is one I have watched since I was a child, and I never truly grasped the real heart of the film until just recently. The story follows two runners, Eric Liddell and Harold Abraham, as they prepare and race in the 1924 Paris Olympics. Liddell was a son of Scottish missionaries, and was under pressure by his sister to go back to the missionary field in China. However, to quote him, " I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run, I feel His pleasure." He was given a heat on a Sunday, but refused to run, because it was the Sabbath. One of the other athletes, came forward and said that Liddell could take his place in another race, since he'd already won his medal. The story is about standing up for what you believe, even if it means sacrificing your own dreams. God will bless you more than you could ever imagine. The sunday that Liddell was supposed to race, he spoke at a church in Paris. While clips of the races play, it has him quoting Scripture. What he says has more resonance with me than ever before. I am scared to go, but I know that God will be there with me every step of the way.

"Behold, the nations are as a drop in the bucket, counted as the small dust in the balance. All nations before Him are as nothing, they have counted to Him less than nothing. He bringeth the princes to nothing, He maketh the judges of the earth as a vanity. Hast thou not known? Has thou not heard? That the everlasting God, the Lord, the creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not. Neither is weary. He giveth power to the faint, and to them that have no strength, He increaseth might. But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint." Isaiah 40

Currently Playing Dangerously in Love By Beyonce see related

- Crazy In Love (oh the memories of summer!)

Hey everyone! Man...I have no time anymore, and this xanga thing seems to be the first to go. Oh well.  Things are crazy! I can hardly believe that I only have 6 weeks (54 days) until I graduate!  "The future's so bright...I gotta wear shades!"(Thank you Ferris!) 6 weeks till grad, then only 7 1/2 until I leave for Africa. Wow. This year has FLOWN by, especially this semester. So many cool things are happening.

Speaking of which, this coming week is elections here at Cal. ASUC- you know the drill. Now, why would I care, since I don't go to Cal? Well, many of you have met my friend Amaury. He happens to be running. Being involved with several different campus groups, I have had to deal with the ASUC. We all know its got some serious issues! Which is why people need to vote in DIFFERENT types of people, so the problem doesn't get exacerbated! Amaury is an awesome Christian guy, who really wants and believes that the ASUC can be made so much more effective and useful than it currently is. I know many of ya'll don't even want to vote and see it as a chore and whatnot. But PLEASE vote- and vote for Amaury- #112-(think 1+1=2!!) He's a friend not only of me, but of Josh and Zach Bruno. Both Zach and I are working for his campaign. I wish I could vote, because Amaury is so passionate about all of this- he wants so badly to change things and get things working to benefit you guys! So yeah- voting is TUESDAY, WEDNESDAY and THURSDAY. Check out the ASUC website to find out where you can vote...Now I'm putting in a letter he wrote to his friends to get them to vote...here it is. And feel free to email me and ask for his AIM, cell, or email because he'd love to hear from you guys! Thanks!!

Currently Playing What a Girl Wants By Various Artists see related

- The whole CD rocks!! Such a good mix...

So this link is to beautiful pictures of where I will be spending my summer from June 1st until the end of July.

 http://www.pbase.com/bmcmorrow/capetown&page=all

Yeah- I'm going. I am going to Cape Town, South Africa. So now comes the hard part- prepping my heart and mind, and raising support. If you know anyone that could help, please email me and let me know. The trip is a whopping $2,700- a bit steep for me. But I know God wants me to go, and He'll provide. As wonderful as all of this is, it has pressed the "pause" button on my grad school plans. However, I'm not worried. I feel like I really need a break right now, and that it is being provided for me in an unbelievable way. So- the plan stands right now that I will graduate(whooohooo!!!) on May 22nd, at 9:30am. Following that, I am leaving for South Africa on June 1st. Returning back to Berkeley/Bay Area roughly the end of July, and maybe the beginning of May. I'd like to hang out with Alissa in France and maybe go to Paris and London before coming home, but we'll see. That would have to be a grad gift or something. To stop in Paris for a week, then in London/Oxford for another week, it would cost me many many MANY pennies more....haha. Whew. But wow...what an experience that would be. Then when I finally get back to the States, I am going to be looking for a job. Hopefully, I'll find one before I go, but if not, then I'll be b ack at working at camp until I find a real job.

This is all really scary, new and exciting all at the same time. I GET TO GO TO AFRICA!! How cool is THAT?? Yay! Man....I am SO lucky. Thank you Lord!  Hope ya'll are doing awesome and hope to talk to you soon! Love you guys! (Especially my Lizzie and Em CB....home stretch now girls... )

Currently Playing Shock'n Y'all By Toby Keith see related

- American Soldier -

Courtesy of  Amaury ....Something for ya'll to chew on.

I am currently away from the computer.
Aight Liberals, let's go through this one more time:
-The recession, which began during Clinton's second term, ended relatively quickly once Bush got to the White House.
* Despite the jolt of 9/11, growth has not once since fallen into the red.
* Indeed, during Bush's tenure, America's economy grew at its fastest quarterly rate in 20 years - a positively sizzling annualized 8.2 percent.
* Manufacturing activity has risen to its highest level in nearly two decades.
* After-tax incomes soared 8.4 percent in 2001.
* Worker productivity is near a 20-year high.
* More folks own homes than ever.
* Last year, the Dow rose 20 percent; NASDAQ zoomed up 50 percent.

Any questions?

Currently Playing Sacred Revolution By Passion Worship Band see related

Grad school applications are a pain in the frickin' rear end!! But- almost done! Then comes the hardest part- the waiting!! Oh well. I've been thinking and panicking....but I realized something. Even just a year or so ago, I would have never thought I would be applying to grad school in Public Policy. I always thought I would end up a teacher or something like that. But over the last year, God has shown me that he wants me to be more than that. I'm not trying to say that teaching isn't great- because it is. But for me, it would have been just settling on something. It's so hard to trust God, looking at my college career, and seeing how that if I was a grad school, I would say "You've got to be joking!" . But God wouldn't bring me here, and I wouldn't feel this passion- this excitement, and this drive if it wasn't something that He wants. I know He has a plan in all of this, and its just hard playing the waiting game and seeing it unfold. I've watched so many friends come and then leave Berkeley with me still here, and felt ashamed, embarassed or even angry that I wasn't moving on with my life too. But now I am. These next few months are going to shape the rest of my life, and tho I'm excited- I'm really nervous. Doing all of this has made me come out of my comfort zone, and that's hard for me. I like playing it safe. But God doesn't play it safe, and to follow Him requires hard work and taking risks. I just hope I'm taking the right ones.

God be with me in the next 4 months- I'll need You more than ever.

Time for me to step out of the water Time for me to just loose my hold And its time for me to leave here all that I've hoped for Could you take me where I need to go I am waiting for your love I am reaching for you touch Lost without you God reach down I need you now, I need you now - Chris Tomlin